If you really knew me...

You may have seen these videos popping up all over Youtube for a while now.  I'm not really into video making--I feel much more comfortable with writing--but I wanted to try it anyway.



Hello.  I'm Andie.  People know me as a friend, family member, or some random blogger they found from a Google search.  Creative, maybe a little clever, and hopefully funny.

But if you really knew me...you would know that at times I feel ashamed.  My parents have been happily married for over 22 years.  I'm the oldest of five and we're all living good, sheltered Utah lives.  All four of my grandparents are living (still married), as well as one of my great grandpas.  I've never lived in a broken home.  We've never been in serious trouble financially.  I have wonderful friends who care about me and more often than not put my needs above their own.  Relatively, my life has been a cakewalk.

When I hear about what others go through, it breaks my heart.  Many my age and younger have gone through so much that I couldn't possibly imagine.  I've dreamed about traveling to remote, far away places with service groups and giving my time and energy to those in need.  Someday my future husband and I will become foster parents and give homes to children with nowhere to go.  With the little bit of education I've had in psychology (and some sociology), I feel like I have something to offer to those in need.

When I think of my own trials...I feel so ungrateful.  But the fact remains that my trials are important to me, and that I need help too.  I'm leaving for an 18 month LDS mission in eight and a half weeks, and I don't feel like I'm anywhere near ready to walk up to people on the street and tell them about my beliefs.  My self esteem has recently stabilized, but I still feel weird when girls younger than me get married when I've never even had a serious relationship.  I have friends who are going through hard times right now, and I've been tearing my hair out trying to figure out how to help them.

After my mission I'll have to finish school and figure out the rest of my life, and that scares me more than just about anything.  And right now, trying to prepare for my mission, I'm starting to feel like the goody-goody wet-blanket friend who drives everyone crazy and never lets them have any fun.  And my friends aren't even crazy party people!

I guess my point is that nobody's perfect.

All we can really do is hope, pray, and serve others.  Have faith in God's plan and never stop dreaming.  Sing your cares away, whether out loud or inside yourself.  Continue to learn and to be reminded that you're never alone.  Your Heavenly Father loves you.  You are the child of a King.

The possibilities are truly endless....

Pray for someone today.